Everything is off. Work is overwhelming or nonexistent. School is in some vague sort of “session”. My kids seemed to have rebelled against the Circadian rhythm and have become nocturnals. Sleep starts and stops in no sense of pattern to allow real relief of the fatigue that comes with #StayAtHome. Currently my rhythm is more of a staccato than a flow. Attempts to #TakeAdvantageOfThisTime with my love for art and painting has been start/stuck/stop/start again. Need more go/flow/glide/sail. Cant seem to fabricate it yet. I am sure, now as I see this written, that I cannot fabricate my rhythm. Anymore than I can fabricate first shift normalcy from this chaos. Pushing harder is not helping. The truth is normalcy has ground to a halt. And the stuck feeling that this causes must be felt and not avoided. Can I savor this staccato as a natural rhythm that needs to express itself to be relieved? After all, you can’t push a river.
Sometimes there is turbulence to ride through, and sometimes there are bottlenecks and dams. If i can appreciate the beautiful dance that comes with varying rhythms as being more interesting and fulfilling than a single steady beat, I can allow this staccato moment to be that grabbing riff that makes the whole song worth listening to. I am confident in the power of my flow. This damned Corona dam will not be able to contain me. But for now I will #TakeAdvantageOfThisTime by dancing my dance and playing in the provided eddy.